Sunday, August 31, 2008

Tarrrrrrrrrrrrrrred....

But just wanted to share - that was the first presidential election rally-type thing I've ever been to - was very cool. The boy lasted through the whole thing and HE got better pictures than I did (the ability to climb higher, I guess). But.. in addition to seeing the (hopefully) next President. I saw my future husband. Granted, he temporarily blinded me with his dimples, but da-yammmmm he was cute. And I think he was happy to see me. Or it may have been a gun in his pocket. Whatever. LOL

Here he is..

Sunday ramblings...

I slept in until almost 10AM today. It was deeeeeeeelightful! Hung out with some friends yesterday, we had dip. mmmmmmm Got to ride in a Wrangler with the top down. This is what the sky looked like:

I miss my Wrangler. Love my jeep - but it doesn't have the topless feel. lol I think next year, I will go back to one. Gotta love 'em.
Went by and checked on the house - the kitchen floor is in yay! and my cabinets and countertops and all of the doors are in the garage. They will go in this week. SUCH excitement!

Today I'm off to see our next POTUS. He's appearing in the town next door. And I'm going with my friend Dude. Cool guy. Plus - his name is Dude. How could you NOT like a guy with a name like that?

Nothing new to report in the Fuckwit Chronicles, maybe that's a good thing?

Oh. And I have raised (so far) the laziest kid in the universe. Lying on the couch, asking me if *I* can heat up the pancakes in the freezer for him. Huh? Are YOUR hands broken?? There are some days that he is so independent it scares me, and other when he is so dependent it's creepy. LOL Oh well. He is my baby, after all.

Friday, August 29, 2008


http://fridayfillins.blogspot.com/

And...here we go!

1. When I'm sick I'm sick, dammit. Leave me alone.

2. When I take a walk, I think about how come I don't do this more often?

3. Money can't buy happiness but it can make life easier. And if your name is Theo, it can buy you a filthy fucking whore that takes your money while making fun of you behind your back AND lives for free in your "extra" house lots of really WONDERFUL friends!!!

4. Cotton makes me happy when it's in my sheets and leather makes me think of whips and chains.

5. The strangest person/character I've had lewd thoughts about was Bozo the clown. Gotta love the big nose. LOL

6. My favorite color these days is yellow because it's bright and sunny!

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I’m looking forward to just chilling, tomorrow my plans include a cookout at a friends house and Sunday, I want to go see Barack and Joe in Battle Creek!

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Silly myspace survey. But dammit, I had FUN. LOL

Can you fill this out without lying?
absolutely!

Where is the person who has your heart at the moment?
My son - and he will always have first place there, too

Are you waiting for something?
my damn house to be finished!!

On the opposite sex where do you like them to have piercings?
ears are cool - anything else is a little too funky for me.
And for any guy that would pierce down there - you're freaking NUTS - that's got to be painful!!

Have you ever kissed someone and hated it?
felt nothing, yeah. Toward the end with my ex I swear he'd go 3 days without brushing his teeth just to gross me out. Ugh.


Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
Um, that would be the ex, and that's a huge HELL NO

Would you date someone who smokes?
considering the fact that I do - who am I to judge?

Would you date someone who was addicted to drugs?
Ahh no. There? I can judge.
Just listen to Whitney - crack is whack!

Would you date someone who lived in another state?
would depend on a lot

What's the biggest turn off?
being dishonest, rudeness, not having basic common courtesy

What do you like most, physically?
A nice ass is always an asset LOL

Have you ever dated someone more than once?
Like as in a 2nd date yes. Dated, broke up and then got back together? Once, but he STILL kept showing his penis on the internet. Buh-Buy....

Could you handle a long distance relationship?
I did for a while. Apparently he couldn't. Or the distance was too easy for him to be swayed by lying filthy fucking whores on the phone. Oh wait. I'm digressing again. Sure! I could handle one.
LOL

If you could go on ONE DATE with any celebrity, who would it be?
Jeffrey Dean Morgan. I love him. I would kiss him even if he never brushed his teeth.
LOL

Do you like cuddling?
depends on who with, how much, etc. I'm a lover of my own space. I like to breathe.
GET OFF ME!!! LOL

Do you hold grudges?
I really try not to. What is it, to forgive is divine? To not give a shit is even better. But a grudge against the filthy fucking whore will, I am afraid, last until her skanky welfare trash ass is thrown out of her free house and she goes back to the trailer she crawled out of. Dammit.
I digressed again!

Do you regret dating anyone?
Not really. Becoming FRIENDS with someone? Sure. Take, for example, the filthy fucking whore. Her I could have done without in my life. But then again, I would never have known how much of a fuckwit the ex is had it not been for her.
LOL

Hugger or kisser?
Both - but not crawl up my ass and don't give me any space hugging and kissing. Like if I'm making dinner? Don't come up behind me and hump me like a dog because that does absolutely nothing for my libido. Probably slows it down in fact. DAMMIT.
I'm digressing again!!!

Missing someone?
my family

Whats the most important thing in a relationship?
NOT HAVING A FILTHY FUCKING WHORE NAMED JOCELYN IN IT.
ROFLMAO
Nah, really? Trust.


What would make you break up with someone?
Jesus Christmas. Dishonesty. Not being able to see reality and thinking that the filthy fucking whore wants you when in fact, she makes fun of you on a constant basis. Oh. And showing your penis on the internet after I ask you to stop.


Have you ever loved someone who didn't love you back?
Haven't we all? Jeffrey Dean Morgan. I love him. He doesn't love me. But only because he doesn't KNOW me. If he knew me, he'd love me. He'd want to have my two-headed love child, in fact.


How important are looks?
Not THAT important, but really, if you've been beaten hard by the ugly stick, it's a little hard to get past that - no matter how nice you are. Apparently I never noticed the penis sticking out of my ex's forehead - that would have been a sure turn-off.


Do you like someone at the moment?
Of course! I love everyone. Except filthy fucking whores.
LOL

The last person you kissed needs you at 3 am and you have a way to their house - would you go?
Fuck no - I'd give the truck that ran over him directions on how to get back!! LOL

When was the last time you wanted to punch someone in their face?
I'm a lover, not a fighter.


What was the last thing you cried about?
Stupid Extreme Makeover Home Edition - seeing a grown man reduced to sobbing at the sight of a new home that is much needed always gets me.


Do you have a friend you can tell stuff to and you're sure they won't tell anyone?
Sure.
Right Kim? LOL

What are your plans for the weekend?
None yet

How many hours did you sleep last night?
7

Have you ever cried while in the shower?
oh I'm sure

Could you go a day without eating?
sure but why the hell would i??

When was the last time you talked to your number 2?
My top friends is random, so I have NO clue who #2 is right now!

Do your parents force you to go to church or let you make the decision?
oh, there was force involved. And we had to bring home a bulletin. Or else.


Is there someone you want to fight?
Other than filthy fucking whores who I would love to just slap silly? No, not really. Like I said, I'm a lover not a fighter.


Has anyone ever told you they're in love with you?
yes - now as to whether or not they actually MEANT it? Not so sure.


Do you believe in true love?
Not sure about that, either.


When was the last time you were disappointed?
A few weeks ago, I heard that someone was actually telling people that they questioned my mental stability and whether or not I should be around their kid. Listen fuckwit - I was DEPRESSED. I went on ANTIDEPRESSANTS. Oh wait, he doesn't read here.
LOL

Do you miss your past?
having my diaper changed, it was easier then........ LOL

What are you doing tonight?
this damn survey, reading a good book, and hanging with my kid

Have you ever broken someone’s heart?
Oh Jesus. Bobby. He cried. But really - it just wasn't there for me. I thought it better to do it sooner than later. Oy vey.

Is there anyone who doesn't like you?
Oh I'm sure I've made a few enemies along the way. ROFLMAO Like, oh, say, a certain filthy fucking whore. Because I tell EVERYONE I know how much of a filthy fucking whore she is. LMAO...

What is wrong with you right now?
Absolutly NOTHING :) I'm fan-fucking-tastic!!

Do you plan on kissing the last person you kissed again?
HELL no!

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Last year... this year...

Last year, we were here:


In about a half-hour, we're leaving to go here:




It's not the Cape, it's not salt water, but it IS the beach. :) And it's where Kim took me before I moved here to see if it would be a good enough substitute for the ocean. It's ok, but it doesn't smell the same, and you don't float as well. LOL

ahhhh Sunday..

Yesterday we ran into the boy's "bestest friend in the whole entire world" who he hasn't really seen all summer. They've been really busy, not us - we're always home LOL.. but she ended up coming over for the afternoon and they had a great time. And last night her mom told me that they're holding her back in 5th grade - she's not going on to the middle school with J-Dawg. I had thought about holding him back, but he's one of the oldest kids in his class now, and while it may not make a difference now - he'd be 19 when he graduated from HS. I remember Eric C. from like 4th or 5th grade, and how he got held back and was at least 19 when we graduated. He was a bit challenged and ended up with a career at the car wash. I know that Josh is destined for bigger and better things, and I know it's going to be up to me to make sure that he can make it in middle school. Which means that *I* need to step up, and also do a better job at holding the teachers more responsible. I feel bad, because I think a lot of 5th grade for him was (academically) without me - I was so wrapped up in trying to find a job, trying to make sure he was going to be OK after what the fuckwit did to him, making sure the FFW's (that's the filthy fucking whore) kid wasn't torturing him at school, making sure of a lot of things - one of which didn't include making him do his homework and helping him study. Middle school is going to be tough for him. But I have to hope that since we're both in a better place that we can do it together. Oy vey.

Friday, August 22, 2008

Friday fill-in!



1. Dancing to the radio while naked makes me giggle

2. The last time I farted I nearly killed myself ROFL

3. When I drive I am easily distracted by shiny objects

4. I saw DUDE standing next to me at the gas station.

5. Give me credit, give me credit, give me credit!

6. Next week I am looking forward to seeing what else is done on the house!

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I’m looking forward to chillin live a villian, tomorrow my plans include cleaning and Sunday, I want to hang with the kid!

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Monday, August 18, 2008

Building walls...

No, not me. Don't be ascared! LOL

We have walls up in the house!! YAY!!! All of the wallboard is up, I took pictures of all the rooms, and will transfer them later from my phone. I'm just too tired to forward them all to myself right now. Or even better - I'll take the good camera over tomorrow and get pictures with the flash. It looks awesome, I can't wait till it's finished!!

So, yet another chapter in the Fuckwit Chronicles. It's a bit like a train derailment, eh? You know you shouldn't look, but yet you can't help yourself. You're a bit curious...

Last I heard about the FFW's boyfriend living in the house was that he was going to "address it". I'm sorry? How does a spineless fuckwit address anything? He runs and hides and deals with it from behind a computer screen. LOL Anyway - I guess her solution was to move him out of the house she's in and move him into the LAKE HOUSE. The $1.4M house on the lake. And of course, since she's his "employee" (don't even get me started on that one LOL) and picks him up at the airport when he comes in (because nobody in his family cares to?) she knows when he comes home, and can get the boyfriend out of the house and CLEAN IT UP - which he pays her for - or is that free rent in trade? Who knows. But me? I'm just giggling at it all. Apparently he has NO freaking clue - what an absolute dumbass. And how cheeky of her, huh?

I'm off to read my book for a bit. :) And giggle.

Saturday, August 16, 2008

Post Secret

So, OK, I'll admit it - I'm a junkie. Sometimes I'll look late Saturday night (well, early Sunday morning) for the new ones. I love having that tiny little peek into other people's lives and what makes them tick (or tock).
What you may or may not know is that there is also a Post Secret myspace
A couple of weeks ago I read through so many pages of how to describe your life in 6 words. That's all you got. 6 words. So many people used more, used less, but a lot put 6. I was amazed at how many were about how they found love and now they are who they should be, or "will you ever love me again" or just not about THEM but about other people. One girl put "I blame you for my wrongs". I actually responded to her and said "If you blame someone else, then how are they *your* wrongs? Either you own them, or you don't." What is it with so many people that they can't own their own choices - or even make their own choices for that matter? My ex (the fuckwit) never made a conscious decision on his own - he would consult everyone around him, then call his financial guy, mother, father, stepmother, stepfather, sister, brother's best friend, dog walker, 1-800-grow-a-spine and then think on it for a week. And then? He'd do the opposite of what everyone told him to do. And when it didn't work out - he'd blame it one everyone else. I don't think I ever saw him "own" a bad decision that he made - he'd sure as hell take credit for the good ones, though (even if he had to lie about how it was *his* idea). But I digress.

I just found it amazing to read. Some great ones? "I LOVE that I'll never understand. No more Iraq, just come back. We're more than words on websites. My children will share with yours."

Mine? I put two "I'll always be smarter than you" (yeah, that was a blatant dig at the fuckwit - he's not that smart LOL) and "I believe in myself, my choices".

But my *real* one that I added later? "Never let another person define you"

Friday, August 15, 2008

Friday Fill-In (thanks Erin!)



1. The last meal I had at a restaurant was pizza. Pizza Hut counts, right? They don't have a drive through! LOL

2. Arrogance and pettiness (that's two) are some things I intensely dislike.

3. The full moon is way cool

4. Wicked pissah is one of my favorite local expressions. Granted, it's not local to Michigan - but it's pretty fun to say here!

5. Sometimes it's best to just keep your big mouth shut!

6. Wall-E is the best movie I've seen so far this year! Actually, it's the only one I've been to. Geez, I need to get a life!

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I’m looking forward to sleep, tomorrow my plans include being outside and Sunday, I want to go to the beach if it's nice enough!

Ahhh Friday!

This is my baby. AKA demon spawn, fruit of my loins, Cornelius, Buddy, dum-dum (but only when I want gum-gum, dum-dum!), boo-boo, and other various nicknames. He comes home today!!! Woohooo!!! Although the silence has been nice.... Well, shit. The silence has been pretty damn nice. Anyone want a kid for a week or three?? LOL I have missed him :)

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Peace... of sorts

So far this week, no bats no cats no elephants :)

And no kid. He's away at golf camp this week until Friday. It's so quiet here it's weird. As much as I'm loving catching up on MY TV, I miss him. So far with my grand plans of going to the gym every night, cleaning up and throwing out a lot of stuff while he's around - I have done none of that! I did, however, catch up on my ER episodes - and holy shit WHO was in the truck?!?!? AND my Gray's Anatomy. That was a cool ending to the season.
Next up? The 10 or so episodes of Law & Order.
I'm a TV junkie, I'll admit it. But when Josh is home, it's all Discovery, History and Military channel. This week? It's all my stuff, HGTV and whatever else I feel like.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh peace.. is it Friday yet?

Friday, August 8, 2008

Mmmmmmmmmm

There's a man, known around these parts as the "sweet corn man"... He actually told me his name once, and I stopped him - and said I only wanted to know him as the sweet corn man. LOL I have a tendency to do that - like John, the interoffice mail guy, I call him "interoffice mail guy". Or did, until someone told me his name, but I still call him that on occasion.
Anyway.... He has the absolute BEST corn I've had in my life. A couple of summers ago, my aunt Harriet and my two cousins came to visit and we got corn from there, and Harriet went ON about the corn - how it was the best she'd ever had, and if you knew Harriet - you know she was a corn aficionado. An addict. Every meal during summer - corn on the cob. EVERY meal.
Today, I went and got some. Mmmmmmmmmm..... it makes me think of many dinners at Harriet's. Best damn corn EVAH... I miss Harriet. But I suppose by having things like the sweet corn man's corn, and remembering her scarfing like 6 ears, she's not far away. :)

Thursday, August 7, 2008

When Rodents Attack...

it sounds like a horror movie, right? You would think!

So my week started off with the car dying, then the bat in my bedroom (or is that bats in the belfry?)...

How does it end?

Well, my car is fixed. It was NOT the alternator. It was NOT the PCM computer thingie that made it get towed from one garage to the Jeep dealership. I get a call this morning. The good news is - it cost half of what I expected. No instead of no trip to Chicago and no food for the week, we just get food for the week. ;-)

What was it?

Oh, go ahead. Guess. You know you want to.


Apparently, a RODENT has been chewing on the wires in the car, rendering it un-chargeable. And useless. So $397 later... I'm ready to kill this...

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

oh happy day!!


Bat aside... 'nuff said. I think it looks pretty snazzy. :D

Oh what a couple of days!!

So my car enters the Bermuda Triangle and the speedometer goes to zero, lights go out, radio off, and when I shut it off - won't start again. Maybe the alternator. Then again, maybe not....
It's been towed from the garage it was at to the Jeep dealership because now it could be the computer module. Shoot me now.

So. That was yesterday and the day before.

Let's move on to last night...

Here's a picture. All snug as a bug, reading my book before bed, getting ready to shut out the light and I catch something out of the corner of my eye. I think, holy shit that's a big moth. And then I realize that not only is it too big for a moth, it's too fast. And it's coming at me. FAST. So I throw the covers over my head and scream. Mind you - it's me and an 11 1/2 year old in the house alone. So I scream more. And every time I peek out - it comes at me again. I finally scream loud enough to wake up Josh and yell at him to go get the broom (what I'm going to do with it, I'm not really sure...) he goes to get it, and it flies downstairs as Josh is coming into my room. I tell him to shut the door, throw all the laundry up against the bottom of the door and we then - after a while - go to sleep. Now to this morning... I get up, shower, and head downstairs in my bathrobe armed with a broom and a towel. Again, what I'm going to do with them, not so sure.. LOL
And I find this..



Um. yeah. Game over.

Sunday, August 3, 2008


these are pretty cool... some quite disturbing, but every once in a while you find some that you can share..

http://www.someecards.com

I particularly liked this one :)

Saturday, August 2, 2008

ahhhhhhhh


I got a bit of my beach fix in. Granted, it's not salt water, and it's not down the Cape. But it's as close as I'm going to get right now. It was good enough that I think we might have to do it again tomorrow!!