Lots of really bizarre shit....

So I got paid last week from my old job.  Won't get paid until the 7th from the new job.  Apparently the old job OVERpaid me, so they waited a week and then reversed the deposits.  And of course - I paid bills with that money.  So it's not there.  And it overdrafts my account.  FANfuckingtabulous.  Then I hit (and kill) a bird on the way to work.  Then it rains.  And my windows are open.  And I have on a white shirt.  I have rather large American breasteses.  'Nuff said about that.

A couple of days ago, I'm talking to my good friend Stevie.  Her son plays on the same baseball team as the FFW's youngest son.  (For anyone that doesn't know about her, there are many posts tagged with "FFW" that give the back story) Hmmph.  Well Stevie has been around since pretty much the beginning after I moved out of the Fuckwit's house, and knows the whole story.  And she says to me that she had a conversation last week with the FFW.  Who knows that we're good friends.  And she says "you know, I kind of liked her.  She seemed very sweet and genuine"... ...  And then proceeds to tell me that they talked about me.  And the FFW has *NO* idea what she ever did to get me so mad.  She *hates* having enemies, and just doesn't understand it all.  And then went on about how I wrote a blog about her, and it was just horrible (for anyone that read it - LOL 'ya think???)..  Anyway.  She had Stevie pretty much snowed.  So I did something.  I wrote her (the FFW) an email.  Here:

OK,

so let me get this straight.  You have NO idea why I ever stopped being your friend?  You have NO idea what ever could have gotten me so upset?

So then answer me these questions - because really, if you had NO idea - I'd love to know the answers..

Why did you continue to call T in California after I asked you not to?

If I could find the email I sent you about friendship and what that meant, I'd resend it to you - and ask you to answer it now.  Because you didn't when I sent it to you.  But from what I understand, you agreed with pretty much everything I had to say in it. 

Why did he Theo of a sudden think he had a chance with you?  From what I understood - it was because that would get him to break up with me - and get me out of the way, right?  Then nobody would be asking you to take any responsibility.  You could continue to live rent free.  Use the lake house any time you wanted.  Use the cars any time you wanted.  Because God knows he wasn't going to call you on it. 

Why was it that me asking you to be more responsible for yourself and your kids turned into "Kathy's being mean to me"?

Why did you laugh when you found out Josh was devastated about T and I breaking up - or do you deny that?  Why did your kid feel that it was OK to walk past him in the hall and say "you suck"  "your mom sucks"  "your Mom stole from us/T"... Which you know damn well wasn't true. 

Do you deny that you lived off of T's generosity for over FOUR YEARS???  Do you deny that you ever made fun of him behind his back?  Do you deny getting pissed off when my son said that we let you live in the house for free?  Because that was the truth?

Fact is - T didn't even know you.  *I* introduced you to him.  *I* asked him to let you live in that house rent free for a while to help you get back on your feet because I was in a position to help and wanted to pay it forward.  It wasn't until later that I found out you lied about C and the reasons you wanted out from that relationship.  Was it really because he asked you to contribute a few hundred bucks a month to the household expenses? 

So come on.  Really.  I'm dying to hear your reasoning.  You want to be my friend?  Prove it.  Acknowledge what you did.    And here's the kicker  - like that friendship letter, you have no idea who I've copied on this.  Who else is going to be wondering what your answers are. 

I don't care about T.  I don't care about what he did - because really, he never knew any better.  And my life is better without him in it.  And in reality, he and I would have broken up eventually anyway - but I would have rather had it be on my terms.  Certainly not yours.   And I think you knew exactly what you were doing.  So, let's see if you can admit it.  Own up to what you did. 

I would never ask someone not to befriend you - or not to be friends with you.  But I will make sure that they know what you're really like.  Unless, of course, you care to clear up any misconceptions I may have about you. 


And then, because that may have been a bit harsh.  I sent her this one.



I'm sorry if this sounded a bit harsh - but really, I'm willing to give you the benefit of the doubt.  If you can answer these questions and explain to me why I was so misled about everything - I'm all ears.


That was Monday.  And I told Stevie that I sent her that.  And said if she wanted to read them, she was more than welcome to.  And we agreed that if she responded, that would mean that what she was telling Stevie was really the truth and she was being genuine.  And if she didn't respond and ignored it, then she was still a manipulative, conniving, filthy fucking whore. 

What do you think she did??

It's a beautiful day in the 'hood....

It really is.  I think that a pool visit may be in order.  Or demanded.  By the large number of screaming females coming to the house at noon.  There goes the plans of quietly reading my book, while eating bon-bons...  LOL NOT!

We have a pool at the development I live in, and it's got a splash park.  Which makes for lots of fun for the little ones.  And God knows I love a house full of peeps - so it's my kind of day  :)

No updates on anything.  Well.  The new job is going well - the people are nice - some interesting personalities.  It's obvious that some people don't like others - but I don't care, I like everybody.  Trying to get a "birthday club" together and only 4 or 5 signed up.  Again - interesting.. 

For the most part, life is good.  I like when it's calm like this - but there's always a shit-storm of sorts just over the horizon.  I think that the Secret Keeper MPU is not a happy person with me right now.  My attorney got a call this week that he's represented by the same attorney he had before (that thought he was a douche - go figure), and there have been some interesting locations showing up on the feedjit lately.   He refuses to answer my emails or send money that he owes - because we all know *that* is the way to get back at me.  LOL  I told him that he can do that, but it only reinforces my thought that he's an ass and to put on his big boy pants and realize that he's got to deal with the fact that he's the boy's father for at least 4 more years, no matter how much he'd like to hide it. 
Whatever... 

Happy Sunday!  I'm going to go make some dip.  :)

Father's Day...

Oy.  Father's Day.  This one is a toughie for me, always has been.

While I wish my father a wonderful father's day - it's a tough one on my son (or for me, not so much him).

We were walking by cards last week in Walmart, and he started laughing when he saw one that said "hey Dad, thanks for everything".. he asked if that would be appropriate to send to his Dad - with a sarcastic twist (wow, he really is my kid LOL).  And he always refers to him as "my Dad"..  I always refer to him as "your father".  Big difference there. 

He was around for the first year.  Kind of.  When Josh had surgery at 13 weeks, he showed up in the hospital on his way to work.  After the surgery was over, said and done.  I was the one that was there at 5:30 am to hand him over to the anesthesiologist, not knowing if I'd ever see him again.  Thank God my stepmother came with me for support, otherwise I'd have been on my own.   We'd meet every once in a while and take a walk, or he would use wanting to see him as an excuse to see me.  Guess I hadn't learned yet.   Josh was just starting to say "DaDa" when he saw him when the shit hit the fan.  On his first birthday, Kevin stopped in (of course on his way to work) and spent 10 minutes with him.  I'd sat around all day, waiting for him to come and spend time with his child.  I postponed a birthday party so he could see him.  Because, really, what kind of person would I be if I didn't do everything I could to make sure that my son knew his father?  I snapped.  I told him that he was more than welcome to see his child any time he wanted - but he had to be consistent and not sneak around to do it.  Not asking much, right?  I decided that what had been good enough for me was definitely not good enough for my son.  He never made an effort to see him again.  We'd run into each other and Josh would say hello to the nice policeman, but I wouldn't tell him that was "Dad".  He didn't deserve it at that point. And because we lived near each other, one question I brought up was "what happens if we run into each other in the store and he sees you?  Calls you Dad?  what are you going to do - run away"...  His response "of course not".. Thank goodness it never happened, because I think that's what he would have done. 

When I found out I was pregnant, I gave him the option of walking away - said "now is your chance to leave, if you want nothing to do with this baby - walk away now, no strings attached".  His response "what do you think I am, an asshole"?  Um. YES?  But at that point I was still in love, trying to regain my dignity and self-respect and getting pregnant by a married man wasn't where I wanted my life to go.  Oh, hadn't heard that story?  I thought I'd posted about it before, but can't find it to link to it.  Suffice it to say it wasn't one of the smartest decisions in my life.   Anyway, I digress...  He chose not to walk away.  And then got mad at me when I took him to court for child support.   Really?  Really?   Anyway - we came to a truce of sorts, and would run into each other and say hello, and he'd spend a couple of minutes with Josh and then be all sad because he wasn't a part of his life.  Whatever - your choice, dude.

He had another child with another girlfriend (Jeanne) a couple of years before me.  She and I became great friends and our kids knew each other (but not that they were siblings).  That ended when I caught her sleeping with Kevin again - him cheating on his wife (yet again) and her cheating on her husband.  Her daughter didn't know him as her father, thought that Jeanne's husband was her father.  There's more to the story, but I'm trying to make this short and sweet.  Right?  LOL

Josh wrote him a letter when he was 7 or 8.  He ignored it.  He's had his attorney come to me in court and say "he just wants to make it clear he wants nothing to do with this child" - and my response was that he'd made that crystal clear for years.  She indicated with her tone and manner that she thought he was a piece of shit.  Really?  Tell me something I don't know.   I told him that he'd had the opportunity to walk away when I was pregnant and he chose not to do that. I flat out told him that since he decided that this child is going to grow up without a father, I decided that he would lack for nothing else - and that Kevin would pay for it.  So every time I can - I take him back for an increase in child support.  And make it clear that if he'd #1 - walked away when he had the chance, we wouldn't be there.  And #2 - if he were a decent human being, we wouldn't be there.

He and his wife have since divorced, he and Jeanne now live together and he plays father of the year to their daughter (who has been introduced and accepted into the family - not quite sure how that was handled...) and the 3 kids he had with his ex-wife.   And who knows about their youngest half-sibling, Josh?  None of them.  Because that would make him look like an asshole.  Really? 

So yeah.  Happy fucking father's day Kevin.  You're a piece of shit and I think deep down, you know that.  I can only hope that some day karma bites you in the ass...

Ahhhhhhhhhhh life....

I started my new job this week.  I don't think I'll have as many good stories as I did at the courthouse, but on the bright side?  I won't be called a "fucking bitch" at least once a day.  That's kind of nice!  And there are some stories - one woman was trying to get hold of someone about the licensing for her day care this week and apparently she rubbed someone the wrong way and was told to call the community mental health for an appointment because maybe THEY could help her.  I had to laugh.. 

It's been quiet, but I'm hoping it'll pick up once I get the hang of things and get properly trained.  Otherwise I'm going to go crazy if it's dead quiet all the time.

What else... hmmmmmm...  really?  Not much.  Which is nice.  :)  I think I'll cut the grass and head to the pool today.  How's that for fun? 

Kind of funny the lack of response from the male parental unit on my email, he's also not responded within the specified amount of days to my complaint for child support modification.  Shocker.  I really do believe that he thinks these things will go away if he ignores them.  Not so much... sorry!

More Shit Defendants Say...

One of my favorites ever to come in.  Bambi.  Who probably deserves her very own post, but I'll condense it.  LOL

Imagine this.  300 lbs. (plus).  Very large fake ponytail on the top of her head.   First off, I was blinded by the ponytail.  Which kept bobbing around as she talked.  Which made my head bob around, following it...  It doesn't bode well for me.  Or Bambi.  She tells me that I'm a public servant, and I need to serve her.  Huh?  What?
Yeah.  That's how this went.

End result, the deputies came in to remove her.  One told her she had 5 seconds to pick up her stuff and get out.   Her response?  "I weigh 300 lbs.  There ain't nothing I can do in 5 seconds" or something to that effect.  His response?  To tell her that if she isn't moving in 5 seconds, he'll move her.  Again - her response "I weigh 300 lbs.  what choo gonna do - drag my fat ass outta here"?  His?  "YUP"...
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"I have an appointment at 8:30"  By appointment, you mean arraignment for the drunk driving charge?  "yes"...
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Woman towing 3 kids with her.  "Can you tell me where Bob Smith* is going to be in court?"...  Me:  He'll be on video in court Z.  Her "come on kids, let's go see daddy on TV"....
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"I think I have court today". 
OK - now this one absolutely kills me.  If *I* have to go to court, I know where I have to be, when and what time.  I can't tell you how many people show up hours late, days early and then say that they lost their paperwork... Really?  REALLY?  Are you stupid???  Oh wait.  Never mind.
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"I'm here to pay my son's fines"...  Oh good - that's great.  Teach the kid responsibility.  It's only a drunk driving charge and he's SEVENTEEN.  Fabulous...


Anyway - only 3 more days of this - then we'll have a whole new pool of peeps to work with.  LOL

Alllllllrighty then!

Lots going on - I graduated May 1st, with some surprise guests that went beyond my wildest expectations - my aunt Harriet's best friend, my bff from 1st grade, another friend from elementary school, 3 cousins my sister and a whole lot of beer.  LOL  A good - no, make that GREAT - time was had by all and it was a much needed "family" visit for me.  I have been pretty homesick lately, and it couldn't have come at a better time.  The only one missing from the picture is my friend Kim, who pulled it all together - and she is missing only because she TOOK the picture!  She got me goooood - apparently they'd been planning this since last year.  And those that know me - know that I'm the one usually pulling things on people, not the one that gets gotten.  LOL

Here is a picture of us all :)

I've been looking for a new job for a while - and finally got a great one.  I'm going from working for the county to working for the state - it's a great "foot ind the door" position, and I hope it will lead to great things.  :)  It was great to be able to give my notice, and I think I made it clear that because I felt I wouldn't go anywhere through the county, that I felt I had to leave for better opportunities.  It's pretty sad the way people aren't recognized for their hard work and efforts.  Oh well. On to bigger and better things.

I sent an email to the MPU (male parental unit) telling him that the boy is curious about his siblings and giving him the option of telling the other kids himself or letting them find out through numerous sources - we have many mutual friends that up until now have kept quiet, the boy could find them on facebook and friend them - can you say "awkward?!?"..  or he could control how/when they find out and tell them himself.  What do you all think happened?  Oh, wait, I'm sorry - I can't hear anything with my head stuck in the sand.  This will all go away, right?  Right?

In any case, I apologize to the innocent people of the state of MA that have to deal with a grumpy trooper.  It's not you, it's him.

21 Days...

it's only been 6 years, 5 moves (7 if you count the big one to Michigan), one ex-boyfriend, 20 lbs. give or take, 2 different jobs and a WHOLE lot of student loans to pay back, like a nice Range Rover's worth... ouch. 

Travel Tip Thursday :)

I've been so lucky to have been able to travel to some great and wonderful places.  One of my favorites so far has been Alaska - such an untouched wilderness.  Enjoy :)  And check out Pseudo for more travel tips! 

Secrets....

I thought this was another one worthy of reposting..  Again, another one for you JB :)

When you block people on facebook/twitter/etc. - stop and think why.  Why?  What are you so afraid of them finding out?  That you've been a badge bunny since forever?  That all you ever wanted was a cop?  Congratulations!  You got one!  What a stellar example of a man you've gotten yourself there, huh?  Such a role model for his kids.   Oh, wait?  They don't want to have much to do with him either?  Not a shock there.   And he gets along so well with his coworkers, too... 



Secrets have a way of creeping up on you, and when you least expect it - BAM!  smacking you right in the face.

I've always been an honest person.  Sometimes too honest.  And I've always told people that the only person you should really lie to is your mother, because mothers really don't need to know everything.  (Don't tell the boy this though, ok? lol)

I've never lied to my child as to who his father is.  He knows his name.  I have maybe omitted some pertinent information because he's not old enough to handle it - but the older he gets the more he is told.  Like now he knows he has 2 half-brothers and 2 half-sisters.  He also knows their names.  I see no reason to lie about this.  They're related.  I have owned up to my responsibilities and I am raising my child on my own.  His father, because he is pissed off at me (I know, right - after all these years?  Get over it - and yourself) refuses to have anything to do with the boy.  He plays father of the year to the other 4.   Three found out a few years ago that they have another sister and have welcomed her into the family.  But they, on the other hand, know nothing about my son.  Two are in their 20's - one is even getting married this year.  They're more than old enough to know. 

If there were a secret like this in your family - would you want to know ?  Or would you rather find out from a curious 14-15 year old kid that friends you on Facebook?  Or a picture from someone's blog?

It's not the boy's place (or really, mine) to tell them that their father is an asshole.  It really should be on him, shouldn't it?  It's not my secret...

Shit defendants say......

OOOH Honey, what you done - you look different.  Did you get youngified overnight?

Me:  why, yes, yes, I did!
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Me: Your payment isn't due until February.
Def:  February?
Me:  yes, February.
Def:  Next month?
Me:  Well, considering that this is January, next month would be February, yes.
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Def:  He told me to come here and do, um, something.
Me:  he who?
Def:  Um, you know.  The, um, guy.  Told me to come here and do something.
Me:  Did you just come from court?
Def: yes
Me:  Did you talk to a Judge?
Def:  yes.
Me:  What did the Judge tell you to do?
Def:  set up a payment plan.
Me:  Oh.  Well that helps.  Here fill this out....
Def. comes back after 10 min, form only half filled out.  "here".
Me:  No - you need to fill it out completely, including how much you can pay per month.
Def:  Well the Judge told me I could do community service.
Me:  Oh, really?  Gee that would have been helpful to know - here now fill out THIS form instead...

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Best one yet?

"Why you got to be locking a Shameka up?"


You can't make this shit up...