Monday, September 17, 2012

Online Dating...


So.  It's been a while.  I thought I'd put myself out there.  You know.  And God knows I don't get out much.

I tried Match.com, but wasn't really impressed.  More on that later. 

My friend Julie has had wonderful luck with plentyoffish.com.  Someone else I know tried it and it worked out wonderfully for her, too.  So I think to myself, self - let's give this a try.

So I post a profile.  With a few pictures that I think are good ones (I hate - absolutely hate having my picture taken)..  And it asks body type.  And really, I have a few pounds to lose - so I put "a few extra pounds".  Seems right.  And I publish the profile.  My friend Tracey and I peruse the local singles, and I favorite a few - they look like decent guys, have a good sense of humor, all that. 

Well. 

Now it gets interesting

I think I've gotten lots of interest.  But none from any of the guys that I favorited.  Apparently putting "a few extra pounds" invites the "I've got a bum in the front" guys to think that I'm they're type.  I'm certainly not going to judge anyone for a few extra pounds, because, like I said - I could stand to lose some.  But really?  REALLY?  It's like Jabba the Hut is out there and looking for me. 

There was one guy that Tracey and I looked at that I immediately switched away from.  Bald on top, long on the sides.  Bright yellow shirt. 

Who do I get a message from?  Him.

Let's call him Bob for the sake of having a name.  Bob sends me a message, saying he'd like to get to know me, and that he used to work but now he's retired.... yada yada yada...



Oh.  And that he's only got one leg.


I politely declined his offer of meeting up.  Maybe today will be the day that someone that doesn't resemble Jabba, a Hobbit or a one legged bandit will want to talk to me.  It's better than Match.com - the man that dressed in "US Flagwear" and had professional pictures taken of him in it with his dog (service dog - he was blind) wanted to meet for coffee.

And I ask.  Is it ME? 

Maybe I'll try E-Harmony..........


sigh.........

6 comments:

Jody said...

Made me laugh. I would date you. Hang in there friend. Sometimes it just ain't so bad being available.

cheatymoon said...

I heard e-harmony was good, but I heard that sometimes they can't match people and tell them so... Weird!!
(txt me, I'll tell you more.)

Anonymous said...

Oh my friend....it took me 3wks for kev to find me. Ya have to admit....its entertaining at best, and its free. i had a few guys go off on quite the lengthy tirade about how I shouldn't be dating....one guy told me to take the length of my marriage in yrs, divide in half and that's how many months I HAVE to be single.

Vanessa said...

holy crap, you are funny. about time i finally found your blog! oh, and i'd date you, too.

K Dubs said...

Oh, and I got another message from one-legged man- he told me basically that I was shallow. I didn't make any cracks about him already swimming in the shallow end of the gene pool, OR the fact that it was his long hair, bald on top look that really turned me off. All prosthetic jokes aside, he really didn't have a leg to stand on with me.

and V - oh shit, you've never been here? Whoops! Just don't read the family shit. LOL

Sa'D said...

eHarmony worked for Harry and I (hear those wedding bells?)

I've had experience with online dating. It takes time and patience, and lots of dates!