Saturday, January 19, 2013
Random Saturday Thoughts...
I've been thinking about age a lot this week. I'm 48. I don't feel old. Except when I realize that my cousin (who is also my godchild) is going to be 30 in March. Yikes. 30. And she was born the year I graduated from High School. Which means that it'll be my 30th reunion this year. And that's more than a yikes, that's a holy shit - THIRTY YEARS.
Thirty years ago, I was thinking about what I'd do after high school. I was warned early on - find your own money for college or 30 days to get a full time job and start paying room & board. Yup. That's what I was told. So college for me, at that time, wasn't an option. I was 17. What did I know about finding money for college. I had no help from my parents. They were too absorbed in how much they didn't like each other. I had an older sister that was in college - but she knew what she wanted to do - and for the record? She dated a guy that showed up at our back door wearing pants with whales on them.
My older brother was in the Navy - he was given some opportunities, but had to back out because (big surprise) my parents wouldn't help him. He actually had an interview that my uncle set up with Al Wang - you know - Wang Laboratories? But my mother wouldn't let him use her car to go to it. Seriously? Yeah... That was my life. It was a mess. Oh, and I was thinking how much I wanted to go back to Greece. I had a boyfriend there. We wrote each other letters. LOL We communicated in German - he didn't know English, I didn't know Greek. But he was dreamy. Oh.. so.... dreamy.... That was one good thing that my parents did - let me go to Greece for a month with my BFF. She was from there, and her parents had a house there, so they paid for the plane ticket - that was my graduation gift. Ahhhhhh Greece. Ahhhhh Tony... I wish I had made different choices that month. I'm not going to elaborate. LOL
Let's see. What was I doing 20 years ago... I was 27. Oh, wait. That was the half-decade of bad choices. We won't go there. Maybe I'm thankful that it was only half a decade, instead of a full one? LOL
Ten years ago? Working in a law firm. Thinking that there had to be so much more. Looking for love where I wasn't going to find it.
Now? I'm in a house that I'm finally considering "home". My kid is happy. He's back in touch with at least one of his siblings (as a result of his father's "LIFE of bad choices").. He no longer has a desire to meet his father - after being told "no offense, but your father is a douchebag" - he got to hear the truth about him, and not from me, which is so important.
I'm actually going to continue to paint, decorate, find a job that I love, and settle into a life that I've made for myself. Maybe it's time to start dating. It'd be nice to have someone there. I think I'm ready for that. Although, most guys my age want the trophy wife/girlfriend at this point - and I'm not either of those. But I'm special, dammit. And not short bus special.
And the mail is here. Happy Saturday. Enjoy the weekend, and I'll be back tomorrow with the Sunday meme... :)